Marita Piņata
This twist on a Mexican Holiday tradition is great fun for the little ones, and terrifically therapeutic and rewarding for anyone who's ever thought they might enjoy getting a big stick and hitting Marita really hard!!!!

 

(1) Purchase an undecorated tramp-shaped piņata form
(if these aren't readily available in your neighbourhood you can:
(a)(i) tie together four long balloons and one round one to approximate the tramp-shaped pinãta form as seen in Diagram 1.
(ii) Cover this with several layers of papier mache (strips of newspaper and white glue or flour-and-water paste work well)
(iii) allow to dry for 24 to 48 hours, or until a solid crust  has formed around the balloons.
(iv) Using a long, thin needle to penetrate the papier mache, pop each balloon.
Or
(b) no tramp-shaped piņata forms?
Move to a more interesting neighbourhood.

(2) Drill a hole approx. 3" in diameter in the back body section.
Fill the pinãta with small candies, nuts, and toys, or for that authentic Marita feel, lies, deceit, and a Do it Yourself Oilien.

 
Diagram 1

Marita Pinãta,
seen here in
Special Representative
to the Secretary General
Tramp mode

 

(3) Seal the opening with duct tape
(a substance the real Marita is, no doubt, more than familiar with)

(4) Decorate the piņata using poster paint or old designer clothing.
Knotted yellow yarn gives a nice bottle-blonde hair effect. Don't forget the oilien-fog in the eyes!

(5) Using strong string, rope, or for that authentic touch, piano wire, hang your Marita Piņata by the head (or neck, which ever is more satisfying) in an area away from breakable articles.

(6) Slap your Marita Piņata with a large stick.
Or a baseball bat.
Or both.
Repeatedly.

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